From satirist Scott Ott in the DC Examiner:  Embryonic stem cell study promises cure for global warming

Hailing a new era “when science is restored to the proper side of the political aisle,” President Barack Obama on Monday promised miraculous cures for a wide range of ailments when he signed an executive order expanding the scope of Bush-era federal funding for embryonic stem cell research.

As he directed more tax dollars to such studies, the president said stem cells from embryos could be at the forefront of the battle against man-made global warming.

“Every human embryo in the hands of a scientist means one less potential source of carbon dioxide emissions,” Obama said, “And because stem cell research could take decades to produce any useful result, it promises to remove millions of humanoid exhalers from the toxic CO2 stream. This could produce an even greater net benefit to our climate than abortion does.”

The president explained that such research is important to his administration for two reasons…

The rest at the link.